I know I’ve had a rough stretch because ending the life of two ewes this evening was the part of the day that felt the smoothest, and for a moment, righted my world with honour and strength for life.
We had an incredibly long day with the sheep yesterday, sorting, weighing, and tagging lambs. When we were done, it was well past dark. We had a tiny bite to eat, a very fast shower to wash off the grime, and went to bed. I didn’t even look at the computer.
In my mind, today was supposed to be a tad easier. It was anything but, and being as tired as I am after yesterday, all the hiccups of late piled up. I sat in the grass and cried in frustration and self pity then went about the rest of the day.
There are many, many good days in this life, as you well know through this blog, but on occasion things just come undone and I unravel right along with them. I don’t always hold it together, and I’m not always able to mind my way out of a tough go.
Yes, it passes, and overall life is good. Yet some nugget is loosened when I write of it and say, yeah, it’s my challenge too, as I’m sure it is for many of you, also working hard to keep a life in some semblance of positive chaos instead of negative.